


unwanted.

by seekrest



Series: febuwhump 2020. [23]
Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: (This fic is my take on that), (but mostly she’s just awkward), (but she’s also sixteen), (sort of), (yes this fic is 3 years too late what about it), (you can’t tell me MJ didn’t have a crush on Peter in HOCO), F/M, Jealousy, MJ knows she’s being ridiculous, Michelle Jones is a Little Shit, Spider-Man: Homecoming Spoilers, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:27:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22864039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seekrest/pseuds/seekrest
Summary: She wasn’t like Liz - popular, pretty, so nice that it would be more annoying if Michelle didn’t know she was being sincere.Michelle was fine, it didn’t matter if she didn’t have friends.But if she watched as Peter walked away, whispering something to Ned - then that was nobody’s business but her own.
Relationships: Michelle Jones/Peter Parker
Series: febuwhump 2020. [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1619581
Comments: 27
Kudos: 115





	unwanted.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is 3 years too late but you know what, it’s fine. This is also _different_ than how I usually write Michelle, a lot more awkward and abrasive than I personally handcanon her to be but for this prompt - it felt right.

“Thanks Edna.” Michelle says, the pile of books in her hand precariously balancing the ceramic mug filled with tea.

“You should be out there making friends, having some kind of conversation. Not holed up with your nose in a book.” Edna gently chides, Michelle smirking before nodding her head towards the loud lunchroom.

“With these idiots? Please. Talking with you will probably be the most intelligent conversation I’ll have all day.”

Edna laughs as she always does, Michelle giving her a quick smile and a nod as a thank you before turning - balancing everything as she finds her way to one of the tables in the back.

Edna always encouraged her to make friends and yet she never denied Michelle the opportunity to have a cup of tea, knowing as well as Michelle did that she was right.

High school was a drag but everyone had to do it - Michelle was looking forward to college, doing whatever it was that she needed to get there. 

She didn’t have any friends but that was a choice, she was fine. Michelle knew the lunch ladies liked her best anyway. 

She gently places her books down on the table when she finally arrives to her favorite table - far enough from the entrance, close to the window for natural light, nudging the pile of books forward until she can move her cup of tea - arranging everything together until Michelle finally feels comfortable with her set up.

Her fingers hover her options before choosing a small paperback, thumbing through to where bookmark was before settling in. 

Books - unlike people - were easy to figure out. 

Michelle’s immediately aware of when Ned and Peter show up with their lunch trays, sitting beside each other like the nerds they were - whispering back and forth. 

Michelle glances over to them, her heart skipping a beat at seeing Peter like it always did.

It was stupid, of all the stupid things in the world, to have a crush on Peter Parker. He was currently completely enamored with Liz, both Ned and her staring at her so fondly that it ignited something almost like jealousy in her chest.

I mean, Michelle understood. Liz was hot, nice and funny. Who  _ didn’t _ have a crush on her? 

But it still stung a little, for reasons that Michelle had no intention of admitting to anyone much less herself, overhearing them as their conversation shifted from something Star Wars related as they continued to stare. 

“Did Liz get a new top?” Peter asks, Michelle keeping her face down and focused on the book even though she’s read the same passage over and over again - the rest of the lunch room fading away as she focuses on their voices. 

“No, we’ve seen that before. Never with that skirt.” Ned replies.

Peter doesn’t say anything at first, both of them still taking her in until he says, “Probably should stop staring before it gets creepy though.” 

The words are out of Michelle’s mouth before she can stop them, the only rational thought she can think of being her impulsive sarcastic nature coming back to bite her in the ass like it always did. 

“Too late.” 

Peter and Ned both turn to her, Michelle feeling their gaze as she puts on a blank expression, raising an eyebrow before saying, “You guys are losers.”

Michelle turns back to her book, hoping they’ll drop the conversation that  _ she _ had started only for Ned to say, “Well then why do you sit with us?”

“Cause I don’t have any friends.” Michelle replies, looking back at them as they take in her brutal honesty with a mixture of confusion and disbelief on their faces. 

Michelle just blinks before turning back to her book, willfully ignoring their stares until they seem to pack up their things and leave - wondering if maybe she’d gone too far. 

It didn’t matter, she was right - she didn’t have any friends and Michelle wasn’t particularly interested in having any - not in high school. 

College was where she could make friends, where her obsession with murder documentaries would find her a cool niche of people who understood her rather than gather her weird stares in the hallway.

She wasn’t like Liz - popular, pretty, so nice that it would be more annoying if Michelle didn’t know she was being sincere. 

Michelle was fine, it didn’t matter if she didn’t have friends. 

But if she watched as Peter walked away, whispering something to Ned - then that was nobody’s business but her own. 

* * *

It’s when they’re decathlon practice that Michelle realizes she’d fucked up.

Michelle was always quiet, took in her surroundings and observed people like it was her job - convinced that it would help provide her with a kickass college application essay.

A Perspective on Youth: A sociological study by Michelle Jones. 

It’s a working title, Michelle reasons she has time to figure it out. 

She’s listening to Peter’s conversation with Mr. Harrington, as she always did, half-convinced of her own theories for why he always skipped out on class.

This time, he seemed determined to skip out on decathlon - something that Michelle knows a few months ago, Peter would’ve never done. 

But then a few months ago it seemed something drastically changed with Peter Parker. 

“Wait, what’s happening?” Michelle hears, flipping a page in her book. 

“Peter’s not going to Washington.” Amanda says, the voices of the rest of the decathlon team starting to pipe up. 

“No, no, no.”

“Why not?”

“Really? Right before nationals?” Liz asks, Michelle still staring down at her book.

She listened to everyone, all the time, the only reason she could tell herself later for why she spoke up being that she was too engrossed in her book to begin with to stop her mouth from running when it wasn’t supposed to.

“He already quit marching band and robotics club….”

The stares from everyone on stage and the quick way the room fell into an awkward silence was mortifying, Michelle glancing up and quickly saying, “I’m not obsessed with him, I’m just very observant.” 

Ned seems to stare at her for a second while the rest go to argue against Peter, Michelle glancing over to see him turning around and looking back at the clock.

Peter was always distracted now, anytime he  _ was _ at school always seemingly eager to get out.

And if he wasn’t, he was with Ned. 

Or staring at Liz.

Which,  _ fair _ \- Michelle got it.

But when Peter waved a quick goodbye to Ned and watched as Liz waved him off too, Michelle could barely hold down the feeling she didn’t want to put a name to that he didn’t look in her direction either. 

He wouldn’t. 

They weren’t friends or anything.

_ But maybe they could be.  _

* * *

Parties - on principle - weren’t Michelle’s thing. 

There weren’t  _ many _ things that were Michelle’s thing if she was honest. She was sixteen, who actually knew who they were and what they liked as a teenager?

Parties were dumb, the music too loud and filled with the kind of alcoholic shenanigans that only came from fifteen year olds whose prefrontal cortexes weren’t developed. 

Michelle couldn’t even explain for herself why she came to the party, not for any reasons that she would openly admit anyway. 

It was an open invitation from Liz, something Michelle was always glad to accept if only because of how much it gave her a sneak peek into the kind of life that she didn’t have.

Two parents who adored her, fancy house in the suburbs, acceptance from people at school.

_No, scratch that_ \- Michelle didn’t want that last part.

She didn’t care about what the idiots at school thought.

Michelle only cared about one.

She had a suspicion Peter would show up, watching him and Ned whisper to each other excitedly about something that seemed to be more common than the  _ other  _ thing Michelle’s convinced of. 

It took all her self-control not to stare at them when they came in, forcing herself to do something with her hands - impulsively grabbing some of the fancy artisan bread that Liz’s mom had out. 

The peanut butter was from some grocery store Michelle thought she wouldn’t even be able breathe in without getting charged - another perfect distraction to prevent her from saying stupid yet again.

Plus, Liz was nice but if Michelle wanted to distribute the wealth a little because the party snacks that were actually out would clog her arteries, well - Michelle was convinced Liz wouldn’t mind. 

Peter and Ned were going back and forth, semi-arguing about something that Michelle didn’t quite catch, working the peanut butter over the bread until they walked up.

Maybe it was the party or the music or just because she was feeling ridiculous for showing up but Michelle took a deep breath and said hello.

“I can’t believe you guys are at this lame party.”

_ Okay, maybe not hello.  _

Ned and Peter both looked confused, Michelle thinking that when it came to her there was no other default when Ned replies, “But you’re here too.”

Michelle picks the bread off the counter, squinting at the two of them before saying, “Am I?”

She leaves before either can reply, glad that she made a step towards interacting with them more - even if the idea that neither of them followed after her just further proved that Michelle had no idea how any of this worked.

Her sociological study wasn’t going very well but it’s fine, she has time. A year or so before she even has to submit the thing. 

Because while she folded her arms and watched the party unfold, Peter disappeared - Michelle hating that she’d talked herself into coming anyway and hating even more that the only reason she showed up hadn’t even noticed her. 

* * *

Washington was a disaster but it all but confirmed Michelle’s suspicions about Peter. 

Mostly, at least. 

She was about sixty-seven percent sure.

Because of it, Michelle had taken up to joining Peter in detention, much to the Coach Wilson’s chagrin. 

Unlike Edna, Coach Wilson didn’t seem to have the same sense of humor. But Michelle didn’t care.

She liked being around Peter, even if there was a part of her that recognized that he didn’t seem to reciprocate it. 

He’d been down lately, Michelle unsure of what exactly happened that made him look like a lost puppy but Michelle committed to being there anyway, sketching him like she did, hoping he would see it as what it was - a sign of friendship.

She should’ve guessed that her subtle nudges were probably a little too subtle when he just stared back her - not saying a word.

_ It’s fine.  
_

_ Rome wasn’t built in a day. _

_ Neither is a friendship. _

* * *

Betty had asked her to go with her to homecoming as a friend, Michelle planning on ditching the whole thing to begin with.

But she’d already said she’d go, even if the thought of seeing Peter show up with Liz twisted something more in her stomach.

They were friends now, she thinks. 

_Maybe_.

But Liz looked beautiful when she walked in, a part of her wishing she could look like her even if another part wondered if she really wanted that or just wanted Peter to look at her like he looked at Liz.

_ Which was stupid. The whole thing was stupid. Whatever, she’s fine.  _

But then he walked up to the school doors and Michelle had flipped him off - friends did that right? - Peter walking straight up to Liz and saying something she couldn’t hear over the music.

It hit at something inside her to watch them kiss but then Michelle was confused when she watched him leave - wondering what could’ve possibly motivated Peter to ditch Liz as quickly as he did.

If Michelle was a meaner person, she would’ve felt happy that Liz finally understood how it felt.

But she wasn’t - awkwardly trying to cheer Liz up anyway, knowing that a girl like her would have plenty of people wanting to dance with her anyway. 

When Michelle heard the news later about Spider-Man bringing down a plan on Coney Island’s beach, everyone’s phones going off at the same time - Michelle wondered if Peter was okay.

Which was stupid. Of course he was. She was only sixty-seven percent sure anyway.

But if she triple checked his social media and Ned’s throughout the weekend, only releasing the sigh of relief she hadn’t realized she’d been holding deep in her chest when he showed back up to school on Monday perfectly fine - well, that’s just friendship. 

_ Right?  _

* * *

“We will need a new team captain next year so I am appointing Michelle.” Mr. Harrington announced, Michelle feeling surprised when he did and even more when the rest of the team clapped for her.

“Uh thank you, my--my friends call me MJ.” She says, thinking back to what Edna had said.

Michelle might as well try and make the most of the time she has in high school, considering all her failed attempts at trying to make friends so far hadn’t worked. 

Liz was gone and while the idea of why she left and the whole shit show that was the gossip train made her uncomfortable to think of, decathlon was something Michelle enjoyed - just as much as Liz did, if not more.

She couldn’t be Liz. But maybe it was okay to be herself. 

It wasn’t like junior year was going to be any more exciting than this one had been. 

“I thought you didn’t have any friends.” Ned asked, blunt as he always was.

She liked that. She’d have to figure out a way to tell him as much. 

He was right. But if Michelle was gonna be captain and by default, have to be more in the spotlight - maybe this could change too. 

Maybe instead of subtle hints at being friends, she could be more outright.

Maybe she’d even talk to Peter without being awkward.

_ Nope. Too far.  _

“I… didn’t.” Ned seems to consider that for a moment before nodding, smiling at her when Peter’s phone starts to go off - Michelle watching as he glances to it. 

“I uh, gotta go.” 

Michelle takes this as her chance to try, leaning forward. 

“Hey were you going?” 

He looks like a deer in headlights, Michelle’s stomach twisting into knots as she leans forward even more. 

“What are you hiding Peter?” He stares at her, pointing towards somewhere only for Michelle to chicken out - reverting back to sarcasm, “I’m just kidding, I don’t care.”

He just blinks, then goes to leave while Michelle turns to the team to talk about drills, only for her eyes to wander as Peter grabs his stuff and walks out the room.

She tries hard not to feel disappointed but can’t help it, pulling herself together as she watches the door close.

Michelle should’ve guessed that even if Liz wasn’t there, Peter wouldn’t notice her.

It shouldn’t bother her.

But it did. 

But Michelle straightens her shoulders, pulling her attention back to the team - Ned smiling at her in a way he hadn’t before. 

Next year was gonna be a fresh start for Michelle.

At least, she hoped it would be. 


End file.
